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Using a sex toy can help couples close the orgasm gap, adds Deindorfer, which is the term used to describe the difference in frequency of orgasm when cis heterosexual women and cis heterosexual men have sex. Considering many vulva owners need clitoral stimulation to orgasm, bringing in a toy that does just that (and more!) can help ensure couples have a mutually satisfying sexperience. Before you start and make your decision you must know what your body needs. Do you want a toy to share sexual pleasure with your partner or to keep it only for yourself. What do you want to stimulate, what material to use